


Come To Me

by DiggaDink



Category: Berserk (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Anal Sex, Angst, Blow Jobs, Dubious Consent, F/M, Heartbreak, Jealousy, Love Confessions, Love Triangles, M/M, Morning Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-16
Updated: 2020-02-11
Packaged: 2021-02-26 04:35:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 12,386
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21817519
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DiggaDink/pseuds/DiggaDink
Summary: He had him, then he lost him.
Relationships: Casca/Guts (Berserk), Griffith/Guts (Berserk)
Comments: 3
Kudos: 88





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> It all started with porn with no plot but I got bored and added more. Poor Griffith. Can we get an F in chat?

Guts enters Griffith's chambers, unannounced and uncalled, "Guts," Griffith calls out from his desk, "Need something?" He doesnt look up from the documents on his desk.

Guts freezes his tracks as he gave the simple question a thought, what was he coming in here for again? He recalls going to his own chambers after feeling unwell from the alcohol he drank yet he found himself here. Even now, the dull burn of the substance lingered in his stomach, it's been quite some time since he's gotten this tispy. He sighs as he pulls at the collar of his overly fancy dress shirt which more than likely costs more than anything he's ever worn in his entire life, "N-no." Guts answers to which Griffith turns around to face him, "Is this a bad time?"

"No, no, it isn't." Griffith reassures, standing up to his feet, "Please, shut the door, it's freezing in here as is." He jokes. He'd forgotten why he came in here and he even forgot to close the door behind him. This castle was large, dank, damp, dark, cold, and has an underlying smell of shit. But it was what Griffith always wanted, like the crown on his head and the empire he built, "I was just about to retire for the night." He undid bows, ribbons, and buttons, "Did you have fun at the ball?"

Guts hadn't realized he was asked a question and quickly snaps out of his thoughts, "Uh, yes." Was his simple answer.

He shuts the door and watched as the king sat on the foot of his huge bed with a sigh, "I struggle with these every single time." Griffith fumbled at the ribbons and ties on his fancy knee-high boots, "I knew I should've called for a servant to help me take all of this off." He wore mostly white adorned with gold, almost angelic in appearance. He looked amazing, it made Guts stare at him throughout the entire evening of the event. Watching him dance with the others and indulge with other nobles.

"Maybe I can give it a try?" Guts asked, quickly doubling down on his statement when Griffith glanced at him, "If you let me of course."

Griffith chuckles, "Guts, you know you don't have to act so formal. I may have the crown, but I'm still me. Your friend remember?" His smile has always been so warm, so inviting, so perfect.

"Right." Guts replied while he approached him and kneels, "I don't know why I'm acting like this. I swear it isn't normal, maybe I'm just a little drunk, I don't know." Guts carefully pulls at the ribbons, trying to keep down his low patience. If it were up to him, he'd just grab a blade and cut them off.

Griffith flashes another grin, "I take it the wine was good. I hardly drank any at all, didn't want to worry the others about potential poisoning. It's happened before, I was drugged after someone slipped something into my drink." Guts remembered that night, how pissed off he was at all of the servants. They prepared all of his meals and some of them had access to his chambers while he was feeling unwell. Guts walked in to find one of them attempting to suffocate his king with a pillow on his own bed. He personally cleaved that man's head off right then and there, not minding the mess as he held Griffith's bloody, unconscious body within his arms. The servants now fear him and they should, if they know what's good for them, none of them better not try it again.

"I remember that, it felt like my heart stopped when I saw you convulsing. You were completely unresponsive." Guts admitted, it scared him it really did. He couldn't stand seeing Griffith like that.

Griffith's hand was gently placed upon the top of his head, "If you hadn't walked in, I wouldn't be here. I owe you one."

"It was nothing, I said I'd always protect you." He shrugs off. Silence washed over them for a moment, until Guts managed to undo the ribbon, "Finally, I got it." He sighs. The next boot was easier to remove and Guts quickly stood up to avert his gaze as Griffith continues to undress. He began to take his leave, reaching for the doorknob.

"I didn't say you had to leave." Griffith spoke, completely nude. He pulls his hair out of the ponytail and pulls on a simple night robe. "Please, stay. At least until I get sleepy and fall asleep?" Guts nods and came closer to sit on the foot of the bed where Griffith sits next to him. He felt Griffith's knee bump against his while he sat. His body immediately reacted to that, feeling the lingering dull heat of Griffith's bare knee through the thin fabric of his pants. Why was this innocent touch causing such a reaction on him? Guts visibly tensed up, to which Griffith notices, "What's wrong? Am I sitting too close?" 

Griffith made the move to get up and slide away, but Guts chimes in, "No, I want you to come closer." Him saying that probably would've made anyone else uneasy, frightened, and uncomfortable. Especially with the way his deep voice nearly growled at the last word. Yet Griffith did as told, seating himself closer to Guts.

"What are you planning?" Griffith raises his brow, though he already knew what might happen with the two of them in his chambers tonight, "You seem to be getting oddly… Affectionate? Is it because you finally got me right where you want me, alone?" His smirk and the press of his chest against his side had him biting at the skin on his bottom lip.

The side of their thighs touched. He felt his own face heat up. If he weren't so dark, he'd be turning bright red by now. Guts wanted to place his hand on Griffith's bare thigh, touch him all over and feel his smooth skin under his rough palms. He wanted to spread those same thighs and fall between them. To feel Griffith's touches upon his own skin and hear his flustered voice as he whimpered for more. Guts watched his hand push strands of white hair out of his own face. This was his chance, touch him somewhere, anywhere. His cheek, no, his thigh. Touch him there and kiss his neck. If he's hesitant, don't stop kissing and touching until he unravels and gives in. Until he begs to be fucked. Why was he thinking these obscene thoughts about his own friend? He noticed the bulge under Griffith's gown when he laid on his back, he was completely soft but the outline of his cock was still there. It felt like he was being taunted. He could practically see through that gown and he's acting like he's offering himself up. Like a "If you want me, here I am, take me." Kind of way. Guts wanted nothing more than to hold onto those hips as leverage while he fucks him. The nerve of this gorgeous man to conveniently pull his arms over his head and stretch, exposing more of his neck. 

Guts took a silent moment to stare at him in the eye, has he always been this… Beautiful? It felt so strange to call another man beautiful, but he could get lost in his eyes. He's never flown before, but he's sure the sky's endless horizon from a bird's eye point of view matches the shade of blue in those eyes.

His hair has grown considerably longer since their first encounter with one another, he wants to touch it and run his fingers through it. How badly did he want to mark his skin, he looks like a blank canvas desperately needing a splash of color. Pink lips, still slightly stained from the wine he'd consumed earlier at the ball. He wonders how far can he stuff his cock in that delicate mouth. Griffith notices him looking him up and down his form and he smugly smirks for a moment, saying something.

He wasn't thinking at the moment, "Did you say something?" Guts asked.

"I asked if you were okay, you got really quiet and choked up." Griffith repeated. 

Guts only nods in response. He should leave, Guts didn't think he'd get this far and he shouldn't be taking advantage of him. Yet the alcohol buzzed within him, making him feel hot bothered at his presence. He craved touch tonight. It shouldn't be his king, it feels wrong. He's mentally arguing with himself to stay. Griffith laid himself on a silver platter and it seems insulting to throw that offer away and ignore the subtle hints he tossed his way.

His plump lips, the way he'd slowly blinked at him, those eyes are asking him, "What are you waiting for? Take me." It's now or never. The tension was there as if it were a thin strand of thread being pulled upon, waiting to snap from the pressure any second now. Griffith lets out a sigh, "Guts," he said his name so soft, like a whisper, "Come to me." Pale arms are pulling him in and their lips clash, teeth bashing together and noses crinkled up as they pressed against the other's. Their kiss was sloppy and rushed while clothing stretched from being pulled upon. So much tension, so much frustration, all being let out at once and upon one another. Guts placed his knee between Griffith's legs. As if on instinct, he pulls his own nightgown up and over his head and spread his legs. So eager, so beautiful. The moon peeks through the curtains of the nearby window, bathing Griffith in a silvery, glowing, pure shine. He looks almost metallic. Guts is in awe.

He finally finds himself between those soft legs, where he'd wanted to be since he stepped in his chambers. Griffith looks more angelic than before in his nudity with his face displaying a shade of red over his cheeks and ears. Eyebrows knitted together in pleasure and mouth slightly agape. Guts relishes in this, staring at his perfect body up and down as he ponders to himself whether or not he should be doing this. What if they regret this in the morning? "Touch me, it's okay." Griffith snapped him out of it and took his hand, so pale and small in comparison to his, and guides it to his stomach then to his cock. Griffith pulls on the edge of his shirt, "Take this off, it's not fair that I'm naked and you aren't." With his shirt gone, Griffith's hands grope at his muscled chest and down his sculpted torso. Regrets be damned.

Guts pulls down his pants and Griffith sat up at his marvel at his physique while more articles of clothing are shed. His hands wander across Griffith's chest, squeeze and pinch at his delicate, pink nipples. "Guts." He moans as the other kissed along his neck and lips seal around his nipple. It all felt so strange, feeling on someone who lacks breasts. He then felt Griffith's hand wrap around his cock, "It's so big. How will it ever fit inside of me?" He heard him ask. Guts had to resist the urge to roughly pin him down by his throat and mumble, "Like this." and shove it in right then and there.

Griffith wants a taste first, so he ushered Guts into his back. He stares at the ceiling while Griffith sucks him off and toys at the tip with his tongue. He acted like he was a natural at this, probably because he was. The way he'd playfully slapped his cock against his own cheek, suck on his balls and stroke him in time with his head bobs. It had him wanting to push his head down deep and hold him there until he cums, whether he wanted to swallow or not. Guts couldn't help himself and he grabs a fist full of hair and holds his head in place where he gave shallow thrusts into his mouth. Griffith choked, but does his best to hold his breath, keep his mouth open, and mind his teeth. Spit completely coats his cock and the filthy sounds of gagging and wet suckling noises fill the room. Guts finds it strangely arousing.

He gets so caught up in the need to cum that he shoves Griffith's head down and holds him there while he spills down his throat and damn did it feel just as amazing as he imagined it would. Griffith tries to pull away for air but Guts doesn't let him. His eyes water as he's left no choice but to swallow all of his release. Guts finally lets his head go and he begins coughing loudly, "Shit, I'm so sorry." He immediately apologizes over and over, but Griffith only licks him clean and wipes his mouth.

"It's okay, really." He smiles, "I thoroughly enjoyed that." Griffith is being laid on his back as Guts takes his position over him once more. He noticed Guts working himself in his hand, "Again? I for sure thought that'd be enough. Not that I'm complaining."

"I can go again, just give me a moment." Guts answers. Griffith only watched that hand stroke himself, licking his lips as he stared and tasting the remnants of the other's essence on his tongue. 

He spreads his legs wider and holds his own legs up against his chest as Guts blindly prodded against his entrance. He felt his large tip press and catch on his rim before finally penetrating him, "Ah!" He shouted as he's speared into. All of Guts attempts to be gentle still hurt and Griffith does his best to keep quiet, "Guts! It-it's so big." He whines, "Hurts." He'll never get used to the stretch and burn of penetration, but it's all his fault for not telling Guts about preparation. He wasn't a woman after all and Guts was clearly more used bedding them. If you don't tell Guts to do something, he won't do it. Griffith felt so hot. So warm like he could melt. Their lips meet and he leads slow and sensual kisses until his lithe body began to grow accustomed to the intrusion though the ache still lingered.

He moans while Guts breaks the kiss and roughly bites at his neck. Guts' hips slowly grind deeper inside of him, "Guts, fuck!" Griffith felt him pull away then thrust back in. He bit at the dark skin of other's shoulder, leaving behind several imprints and marks while he cries out curse words. His heat was overwhelming but welcoming, surrounding him in it. He felt safe, secured, and loved within those huge arms. The same arms that wielded that huge sword which probably weighed more than Griffith. He felt as though, if that heat left him, he'd be lost and forever cold. He never wants to let him go. He cries out his name and tells him to fuck him harder.

Guts sits up to stare at that puckered hole which widened so far to take his girth. He saw a hint of red on his cock every time he pulled out. Blood. That was to be expected and it doesn't slow him down. He's never bedded a man, yet Griffith makes him feel like he's buried deep inside of a woman. Hell, he even looks like one. He pulls Griffith onto his lap and the other yelped. Gravity spears him down on that fat cock. He shouted while Guts easily hoists him up and down, fucking him like a toy. The man was built like a tree trunk and Griffith's arms could Just barely wrap around him. Guts' hips mercilessly slam into his depths. "Feels like a cunt." Guts found himself moaning. He even absent mindedly went to grope at breasts, only to realize there were none there.

"I'm no woman." Griffith laughed, noticing Guts attempt to grope at what isn't there. He felt Guts all the way to his stomach and he wouldn't be surprised if his abdomen had a bulge from how deep Guts sheathed himself over and over. He was certainly going to feel this in the morning. A dull ache of his entrance and throbbing from within. "Never thought the mighty Guts would be into other men." Maybe he only likes Griffith because he looks like a woman. Did other people who had him before he did think the same thing? Took this beautiful man, bend him over face down ass up and fuck him while pretending he was a woman? He could definitely pass as one. The only thing giving him away was his build. While Guts views Griffith as thin and delicate, he still has the obvious body of a man. Wide calves, wide shoulders, visible bicep muscles, body hair all over, and sculpted abs.

Griffith looked so messy debauched within his arms, it felt good seeing his normally preserved and calm king reduced to such a vulnerable state. His hair was all over the place, the area around his eyes wet with tears as long lashes upon his eyes fluttered shut. Guts felt the tell-tale burst of warmth in the base of his cock, "I-I'm close." He warns as his shameless thrusts grow sloppy, uneven, and harder.

"Let me feel you," Griffith clenched himself tighter around his member, "Inside." He commands, "Say you're mine, now and forever." Being fucked by Guts as he comes closer to orgasm is the equivalent of a horse suddenly breaking into full speed while in an improper riding posture. He wasn't expecting this level of intensity and the force of his thrusts made the bed slide. His insides screamed as they were being mercilessly pounded into.

"I-I'm yours, forever." Guts was so used to pulling out last second and spending himself all over the skin his partner, but not today. He wanted him to finish inside? Fine, he'll give his king what he wants. Guts sets him on the bed again and he's on his back with his entire lower half being held up by Guts. Hands grip his legs behind his knees and holds him up, "Griffith," Guts couldn't finish what he wanted to say before he's cumming. He doesn't slow or falter, fucking into that heat like he'd die if he'd stop.

As Guts spends himself inside, he grabs his own length. Guts watched him stroke himself until completion, spilling over his hand and stomach and squirming whilst he grinds inside, "Oh, Guts." Griffith moans, continuing to stroke himself through his drawn out orgasm, "Don't stop."

Guts must've rocked his hips and slowly fucked Griffith for another hour. Watching his king cry out and shiver when he slammed into his prostate. He managed to milk another orgasm out of him, this time, untouched. Griffith squeaks through his toe-curling orgasm all while Guts slams home, "Damn." Guts swore under his breath, watching his load pour out of his hole as he clenched down on nothing. Guts spread his cheeks for a better view.

"Stop that," Griffith playfully swats at his hands, "That's embarrassing." It really wasn't, he's had this done to him in the past. Old men would carelessly spend themselves inside of him whether he liked it or not. Then they'd lick sloppily at his hole afterwards, it always made him feel disgusting inside and out.

"It's alluring." He palms at his cock which began to harden. "Let me have you. One more time."/p>

Guts awakens. The obnoxious feeling of light headed and faint hits him. What did he do last night? Where was he again? Oh, right. His gaze fell upon his slumbering king at his left. He slept so soundly and quietly. They fucked last night, didn't they? Guts placed his hand on his ass and spreads him. Yeah, they did alright.

Griffith fell asleep so fast, he doesn't even remember falling asleep. When he wakes up, he was on his side and he felt Guts slowly enter his tender rear. He gasps out his name.

"Quiet, now. It's morning. They might hear you." He felt a hand on his throat then it travels up to his mouth. Griffith raises one of his legs up and holds it there as Guts fucks him sideways. He didn't last long and he was desperately searching for a spot to mark that was out of view before he settled on the back of his shoulder. Guts bit down on that spot and Griffith bit back a cry of pleasure when Guts finished inside with a particularly hard thrust. He watched Guts out of the corner of his eye get on top of him, "Roll over." Griffith rolls onto his back. His cock standing straight up and pressed on his own belly.

"Guts-" Griffith's breath hitches when Guts touches him, "What's gotten into you? Do you never tire?"

"I do, but, damn, you awaken something inside of me, I feel like I've been missing something. I just have to have you over and over until I feel whole." Guts answers.

"Smooth talker." Griffith smiles. Touching words coming from someone like Guts. He praises him and swears under his breath as Guts strokes him, "Yes, please, please touch me." Griffith thrusts into his fist. He bites his own lip, watching his own cum paint Guts' hand and across his abdomen.

Griffifh brings that same hand up to his mouth and tenderly licked it clean. He draws his fingers into his mouth to suck them clean too one by one. Guts smirked, "Damn, I could fuck you all day." Guts touches himself while Griffith watches. Eager hands pry his legs apart and place them on his shoulders. "I'm sure you could." Griffith purred. The tip of his cock easily slides inside of him, "If I didn't know any better, I'd say you can't get enough of me," He stares lovingly into his eyes, "Is there more I need to know?" Griffith caresses his cheek, "Are you attracted to me, Guts? As much as I'm attracted to you?" The sudden confession felt like it came too soon, too sudden. Griffith almost wishes he hadn't said that but it's too late now. Fuck it. Guts was balls deep inside of him. Nothing should be held back. Time to tell him how he feels. How he's always felt. Griffith would hide it and refuse to tell a soul. A secret he's considered taking to his grave. After all, he has noticed him and Casca have gotten closer. He didn't want to intrude on their budding relationship, but all doubts have slipped his mind at the moment and he didn't regret a thing.

Guts himself didn't want to admit it and he, for some reason, couldn't answer. He could say he loved his king over and over in his head, yet when it came to forming the actual words to Griffith's face, he was dead silent. It was embarrassing, really. He didn't know what to say. He didn't know how to react. It all felt so strange and the world felt like it slowed to a stop after that confession and question.

He places his hand on Griffith's throat instead, hearing him gasp out, "Answer me." Guts shuts him up by placing his hand over his mouth and Griffith demands an answer once again, muffled beneath his palm. Griffith's hands pull and claw at Guts' wrist then scratch at his bent knees and thighs when he began to thrust. Guts for sure has welts on his skin, on his wrists, knees, and now chest. He calls out Guts' name as he tries to kick him away. But Guts was stronger, heavier and he fucked him until the struggling stopped and his commands silenced. He should feel bad for doing this, but the way Griffith's eyes roll in pleasure and the sudden tight clench around his cock only spurred him on. Part of him feels more turned on from this, watching Griffith struggle and try in vain to push him off while he fucks him hard.

Guts finishes inside of him with a muffled groan of his own as he leaves a visible hickey upon his neck. His legs ensnare around his waist tight, but then they kicked him away when the thrusting stopped. He sits back with a sigh and watches as his king stared blankly at the ceiling, "What is the meaning of this?" His voice cracked, "Why couldn't you answer me?" Griffith fights back tears, "Do you not love me?" Guts, once again, couldn't answer, only staring at him quietly, "Was I just an easy fuck for you? Did you imagine someone else in my place?"

"Griffith-" he finally answers, but is quickly cut off.

"Who is it? Was I Casca to you?" Guts wasn't sure what to say, so he remains silent, "I should've known." Griffith sits up to pull his knees to his chest and dig his own nails into his sides. He felt horrible for what he did. He couldn't answer the questions, nor could he deny his mind putting Casca in his place. But he also adored Griffith, in ways more than just a friend. Hell, maybe he was only attracted to Griffith because he looked like a woman. If he had to sleep with a man built like himself, he'd refuse. Yet when it came to Griffith, he wouldn't hesitate to fuck him raw.

Guts doesn't say a word as he gets up and dressed himself. He hesitated leaving for a second, to see if Griffith would call him back like he did before. Yet no such call came. When the door clicked shut, Griffith allows the tears to fall as he bites his own bottom lip, "I'm such an idiot for thinking something like this was even possible," He cries out in his head, "Guts doesn't love you, he never will. And you are a fool for thinking otherwise." His mind went back to Casca and the way they'd always find a way to touch each other in some shape way or form. The way she'd always smile and stutter when they spoke to each other. Did he bed her yet? No, because then, none of this would be happening. He would have Casca to fuck instead, not him. Maybe she rejected his advances and left Guts wanting what he couldn't have, so he let it all out on him to fill that void. "He fell right into my lap, made love to me several times yet he still left me wanting." Griffith felt his throat tighten as he tried to hold in his rage-filled cry, "I feel like a pretty face to be fucked and discarded until next time."

No use wallowing in grief when he had a kingdom to run. Several women are constantly stepping forward, offering themselves to him to be his wife and promise him an heir. That, or mothers would offer their daughters up instead. He turned them down as he's done many times before. He already achieved his dream, what's the point of marrying a stranger? He doesn't need a queen. His heart didn't belong to them anyways, as it only skipped a beat for another. Documents and letters needed to be read, written, and signed by him. Meetings with other nobles needed attending to. He didn't see or speak to Guts at all that day, probably for the best. If he had seen him now he'd probably break down in tears, curse and cry at him. He requests for a heavy-built servant to pleasure him that night. Instructed him to hold him down and fuck him hard, just like Guts does to fill that empty hole in his chest that was left behind after their coupling. It doesn't feel the same and he dismissed the large man afterwards to cry himself to sleep. He awakens with a headache the following morning.

Griffith notices Guts sparring with Casca from his balcony. They were relatively far away in the middle of the field for the horses, but he could still make them out and see their lips move when they spoke. Had he moved on from that incident already? He doesn't call out to get their attention, only sighing and going back inside when they stopped sparring and locked eyes with one another to talk about something. Oh how badly he wanted to punch Guts for making him feel this way. That confused, lying, attractive, handsome son of a bitch! How dare he fuck him senseless, kiss all over him, say those things to him, then refuse to acknowledge that he's in love with him, only to go out and fuck with someone else right in front of him? As if it never happened and as if he isn't here? He looked up and outside at the wrong time, seeing Casca kiss his cheek. He doesn't know the context and he doesn't need to know for it to bring his blood to a boil.

That alone sent him into a frenzy. A chair was thrown, a mirror shattered, a poor, unsuspecting servant coming in to check on him terrorized with his scream and a vase thrown at the wall near them. Why? Why? Why? What was wrong with Guts? What was wrong with him? Is he ugly, unattractive? No, impossible. Is it his personality? What does Casca have that he doesn't? He could be good to Guts, he could be good for Guts. Pleasure him in ways he never thought possible. Have him constantly coming back for more. Is Guts just secretly homo and refuses to come to terms with it so he plays along with Casca's antics to live a lie? Forcing himself with a woman to hide from the judgement of others? Is he into the both of them?

No, he won't allow this to happen. Guts is his and his alone, he'll be damned if he had to share him with another. Guts had better make up his fucking mind. He kicks over his desk, throws documents and books everywhere. Curtains snatched down from their framing on the windows. "My Lord!" The servants try to calm him, but it only ends up pissing him off more and he swings at one. 

"Get away from me!" He screamed, missed his initial punch, but they backed off in fear. They crowded his chambers, surrounded him. Constantly asking him what was wrong, "Shut up! If one more person asks me what's wrong I swear to God, I'll-" He punches a stone wall and the bones instantly shattered upon impact. Griffith holds his wrist and screams in agony, falling to his knees and then the floor. Several servants come in to hold him down as they assess his damaged hand and try to calm him down. He's caused a scene as more servants and guards look into his chambers while he thrashes about. Griffith finally calms down, but now he has a headache from the crying. The decent sleep that follows dulls the pain at least.

Griffith awakens, Guts next to him and Pippin holding up a cup of water to which he eagerly drinks down. From outside the cracked door to his chambers, Casca calls for Guts alone and he notices her angrily scolding Guts on the other side.

"You did this, I know you did." She shoves him, doing her best to keep her voice down. Guts looks defeated, only staring at the ground and nodding quietly with each sentence and question she spat sat him. She was trying her hardest not to shout and slap him around.

All core members of the Hawk were there and around his bed as well as servants finishing up cleaning the mess he made. Perhaps he overreacted. Made everyone needlessly worried because he can't stand rejection and seeing his love with someone else. Griffith clears his throat, "Can Guts and I have a moment?" He spoke just loud enough so Guts could hear from outside the room.

Everyone leaves and Guts enters, shutting the door behind him. Almost instantly, Guts leans down to lay his head on Griffith's chest, "I know this was caused by me, I'm so sorry for doing this to you." He brings Griffith's bandaged hand to lips and kisses the damaged knuckles, "This is my fault, I led you on and when you questioned me, I ignored you and abandoned you. I am in love with Casca. During our entire tryst, I kept thinking about her. I was tipsy and horny, and I wanted you that night to satisfy me."

"Hmph," Griffith's heart felt heavy, "So I was right. I was a fill-in for you."

"I couldn't stand to break the news to you right there, it wasn't a good time to do that." Guts couldn't look him in the eye, "I knew I should've left, better yet, I should've never came blundering to you that night," If Griffith hadn't loved this man, he would've kicked him in the face by now, "You'll definitely never forgive me for doing that, but listen to me." He paused to sit up and stare at the bandaged hand within his own, "I've always had a soft spot for you, while I could've went to Casca that night, I picked you. I felt like you were the right one for me at that moment. I was just too much of a coward to admit it. And look at where it's gotten me. I've lost you and now Casca is mad at me because she knows what's going on between us." Griffith listened on, "And now I can't have either of you. I never thought it'd get this bad."

Griffith sighs and rubs his eyes with his good hand, "Just shut up and tell me you love me, how is it that hard?" He couldn't help but smile.

"Fine," Guts replies, "I-I love you." Oh how flustered and embarrassed he was. It was adorable, really. He leans in to kiss his king.

"Guts, do you really have feelings for us both?" Griffith asked in disbelief. He didn't want to think about it, it hurt him to think his love is in love with another.

Guts was silent for a moment, trying to think of an answer, "It's-it's complicated. But yes, I have feelings for the two of you." He couldn't look his king in the eye when he said that, only staring at his hand.

Almost instantly, his facial expression changed to a frown. Griffith pulls his hand away, "Well then. You should think about it and pick which of us you want, because I'm not sharing you. I'll never share you." He rolls onto his side and turns his back to Guts.

"Griffith, please. I can't pick, you know I can't do that. I want you both." His placed his hand on Griffith's shoulder to which Griffith pulls away.

"Guts," Griffith sighs, "I will not repeat myself. Me or her." The silence that hangs over them is heavy, almost suffocating from the weight it bears down on them, "If you pick her," it pained him to say that and he hides the crack in his voice that threatens to expose the fact that he was on the verge of tears, "It's fine, I won't be upset. But don't expect me to be a hole you could crawl to and fuck on the side when things get tense between you two. I will not be used again." It's been done to him before. More times than he could count and could stand to admit. Cheating husbands would fuck him when their marriage would start to crumble. With that, Guts stands and exits his chambers without a word.

Griffith felt sick, felt like he needed to puke. He was shaking uncontrollably under the sheets. He once again felt the urge to destroy everything. He left betrayed, used, hurt. It felt like he was asphyxiating, no matter how hard he'd inhale, no matter how much air he sucks in to where his chest felt like it'd burst from the capacity. "Fuck." He grits out, "Fuck, fuck!" He repeats over and over. Pippin is there again, hovering above him next to his bed. Griffith sits up to cry to him, rant and explain everything that's happening. He just listens quietly and said nothing. Pippin was always a great listener and non judgmental. He lets the king lean and cry on him.

Guts hasn't spoken to him since and he's rarely ever seen around the castle. He and Casca have drifted apart as well. He believes she's just like him, not wanting to share their lover and telling him to choose. Griffith always ponders if Guts would just pack up and walk into the night without telling a soul. It hurts him to think that. He doesn't want Guts to outright leave, never to be seen again. Will he write to him if he does? Probably not, but Griffith couldn't stand to think about it any further so he pushes the thought out of his head.

When Griffith laid in his bed for the night, he couldn't sleep. "Guts." He said his name out loud, "Come to me." Nobody would hear him, his pleas falling upon an empty room, "I need you right here with me." He feels cold inside and out. His bed felt overly large without him. Goosebumps broke out across his skin as his hand travels down his body to touch the throbbing between his legs. His eyes sting with tears as he reached his climax, expecting some form of relief. No such feeling came. Griffith's eyes flooded with tears until they blinded him. He only felt hollow, cold and craving the warmth of another.

"Guts."


	2. Come Back to Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Something doesn't feel right, it's as if, something or someone is missing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo, I made a part 2 after feeling awful for poor Griffith. I like breaking his heart, he deserves it. Been sleeping on this since December and hesitant to post it for forever, but here it go.

The air felt strange, in fact, he felt strange. Something didn’t feel right at all. Griffith couldn't put his finger on it, but a sense of dread washed over him. His mind refused to leave it be, no matter what he did. Words fell upon his deaf ears and he couldn't recall a word anybody had said to him all day, all he did was nod quietly while his mind drifted elsewhere. He hadn't seen Guts in a long time. This typically happens, though. Guts wasn’t obligated to stay at his side and in the castle at all times, he had the freedom to roam throughout the kingdom. Usually he’ll come back and, if he does leave, Guts would tell him where he’s going. This time, he left without a word. Griffith began to think the inevitable at the back of his mind, but he couldn't find himself to believe it. His eyes sting with tears the more he became willing to face the facts and accept. Griffith frantically searches his castle until his legs ached and his feet screamed at him each step. People began to ask questions, pondering if something was wrong with their king but he shrugged them all off. “Don’t worry about it, everything’s fine.” He’d lie.

It was late, still no sign of Guts. He wanted to pull his own hair out and scream at the top of his lungs. He laid at the center of his bed, staring at the ceiling. The feeling of wanting to cry began to overwhelm him but no tears came, only the familiar burn of his eyes and his sinuses filling up with fluid. Griffith bit his lower lip until the pain forced him to stop. Casca came to him with a knock on his door. He didn't need her to confirm what he already knew. Guts is gone. No warning, no goodbye, not even a note left behind. He should’ve stopped him, he could’ve prevented this!

She had been crying earlier with her swollen, red eyes. He invited her in and comforted her until she fell asleep in his bed and only then did he finally allow himself to cry. His fists were balled up so tight, the nails dug painfully into his palms and Griffith found himself slamming those fists into the bed. Why did this have to happen? Why, why did Guts have to leave him all over again? He blames himself, he blames his selfishness. How could he be so blind? So ignorant? This could’ve all been avoided. He was glad everyone else was asleep because he didn’t want anyone to see him like this: a pity, a mess. Face red with rage and overexerted from tears. Somehow, Griffith manages to weep quietly enough as to not wake up Casca. He does so by pressing his face into his pillow so hard, he nearly suffocates himself. As usual, the awful ache of a headache kept him up longer than normal, but he eventually fell asleep.

That was four months ago, but Griffith still had hope that he'll at least write to him, he prays to find something from Guts within his mess of letters upon his desk. Though he has yet to receive such a letter, he still hasn’t given up hope as he searches the pile every morning. The servants stare blankly at him as he makes another mess for them to clean, tossing and pushing letters and documents off his desk and onto the floor. His chest aches and his heart feels heavy and slow in rhythm, as if it's being weighed and slowed down. Other Hawk members felt what he was feeling when he told them all Guts left. Griffith couldn’t hide something like that from them, they would’ve found out eventually. They began to check on him more frequently, often gathering in his chambers to calm him down with chatter and alcohol. They try to take his mind off of things too, and it helps. He does his best to stay positive and smile alongside them. He tries to tell them that he's okay and slaps a fake ass smile on his face. They can see clean through that mask he wears. They knew how important their bond was and to see it come to a sudden end tore a hole in their king that he desperately tried to hide. It hurts so badly to lose him.

“I- I miss,” Griffith struggles to finish the sentence when he trails off to hold back tears, “Him.” He sighs. He never knew how much he loved Guts until he's gone.

He’s crying again, and someone’s patting his back, “We miss him too.” He hears Jedeau respond. To drown the sorrow, he downs more than half of a bottle of alcohol despite Corkus trying to hold him back. Corkus wasn’t mad over the fact Griffith was going to drink himself stupid, he was mad because he’s going to drink all of his precious wine.

“Griffith, please, save some for me. It’s my bottle!” Corkus attempts to pull it away from his lips.

Casca chimes in, “Really? Is that all you care about?”

“Yes! I bought it and it’s mine. This one wasn’t cheap.” Scoffed Corkus. Griffith’s head felt heavy, he can’t remember when was the last time he got this drunk. It was kind of fun, actually. Guts wasn’t in his mind anymore and he actually managed to flash a smile that wasn’t fake and forced. 

He was absolutely shitfaced and elated, “Fuck it, I’m getting drunk too.” He didn’t know who said that, the voices surrounding him suddenly began to sound the same. Griffith couldn’t recall what he did, but he hopes it was tame and nobody got hurt. He falls asleep uncomfortably in his chair until someone carried him the few steps over to his bed.

Maybe he should've talked to Guts, or at least, given him the impression that they're still on good terms. The last thing he wanted was to piss him off. Shit, what if he hates him now? Guts must’ve left with nobody to talk to or hear him out, feeling antagonized. Perhaps that could've been prevented if he had just sought him out and hugged him, kissed him, told him he loves him no matter who he chooses to be with. He should've been paying attention, maybe he would've seen him leave and had been able to follow him into the night to beg him to stay.

He was long gone, leaving behind no physical traces of his presence. Save for the ache in everyone's hearts and the faded, barely visible love marks littered upon Griffith's perfect skin. He often ponders if Guts misses his body, misses holding him down as he fucks him into babbling nonsense. Pulling on his hair roughly and grabbing him by his throat. Their first night together consistently stayed in his thoughts whenever he'd lay in his bed. The same bed he was absolutely ravished on for multiple rounds straight. He finds himself often spreading his legs for the man that isn't there to take his place between them. Guts' moans and groans echoed in his mind along with the sound of Griffith’s name upon his lips when he climaxed.

His body is hot, but he made no move to push away the blankets that trapped in his heat. Instead, his hand closes around himself and slowly strokes, he tries to make himself enjoy it, tries to get himself hard within his hand. He thinks about being bent over and fucked, allowing himself to fall limp and praise Guts for his actions. Tell him to go harder, faster, deeper. No, command him to go harder, faster, deeper. Think about being rolled over and driven into while his hand presses over his mouth and the other pin his wrist down to the bed. Alas, he is still soft. Pathetic. Pitiful, "Fuck." He swore into the empty, dark room. Griffith shuts his eyes to focus and tries again to arouse himself, filling his head with images of Guts. He pictures himself drooling, eyes rolled back, and mouth agape while Guts slams into him against a wall. He curses out loud again when he failed once more, “Fuck!” He shouts. His hand slams down onto the bed and he kicks off the blankets to roll onto his side and force himself to sleep.

The sounds of crackling thunder jolts him while he dozes, a storm was passing over. Parts of the castle took in water and the ceiling leaked in certain places. This castle was meant for mostly defense and it did not fare well with excessive rainfall. It rained all day long, it was a dark and dark gloomy day. Nobody was outside like usual because most vendors were closed. Everything felt so monochrome. Trees gave way from the wind and destroyed several homes, multiple herds of people’s cattle were lost to the storm as they scattered in panic through their pastures. The complaints of citizens stayed in his mind as they yelled at him to do something about it, as if he's at fault, as if he summoned the storm. Maybe it's what he deserves as punishment for what he did. Today was truly a shit day. To top it off, he deals with an uncontrollable itch that needs scratching he couldn't do himself. It tore away at him the longer he lay there. Griffith’s sleep came earlier than usual, oddly soothed by the pitter-patter of heavy rain against stone and distant booms of thunder as the storm’s wrath came to an end.

He heard his name being called and felt weight on his shoulder. Griffith mumbled something, he doesn't even know what, and opens his eyes. A dark silhouette looms over him, looking as though he were ready to pounce on his prey. He was dressed as if he were leaving, or rather, returning from the outside. The dark droplets of rain had absorbed into his cloak.

"Guts?" He blinks away the dryness in his eyes as he quickly sat up. He leans down and hugs him. Griffith revels in it, his scent, his touch, and his heat. The heavy smell of rain, humidity, and pines from the nearby forest clung to him and filled his nostrils, "Why," he called out, "Why did you leave us? Why did you leave me?"

Guts delicately cradles his cheek, "I’m sorry. I- I felt like I made you so upset that you didn't want to see me again and didn't want me here anymore-” 

"What? No, don't say that." Griffith's voice cracks, "You are always needed and welcomed here, but I suppose it was my fault for making you feel that way, I should've never let us end on bad terms." Griffith recalled that night, how he refused to look Guts in the eye and how he selfishly turned his back on him, refusing to even touch him.

“Griffith, I know what I did hurt you, and I made it worse by leaving." He adds, "I'm sorry. I guess I needed to clear my head and take time alone. I should've never left you. I'm so sorry, Griffith." His thumbs began to wipe away his tears on the other’s red cheeks.

"No, I'm sorry. It's my fault, Guts. I never wanted it to end like this and I didn't mean to drive you away. I should've talked to you, I shouldn't have been so bitter and allowed myself to suffer in silence for this long. I waited too long to tell you how I felt and now it- it made a mess of everything." He stutters. Even if Guts decides to be with Casca, he's still more than happy to have him back at last. Just laying eyes on him after so long set him at ease. He wants to kiss him, but hesitates. Only allowing their foreheads to touch, "Why'd you come back?" He breaks the momentary silence between them.

"I've missed you and I've made my decision like you wanted me to,” Guts pauses, “I want you." He kisses him and Griffith swears he sees stars behind his eyelids. It’s just like what his fictional romance novels describe when love-struck younglings have their first kiss with their true love. He breaks the kiss to sigh, "You deserve someone else much better than me, and if you refuse me, then that'll be fine. I understand." Guts averts his gaze downwards with his head hanging low and Griffith lifts him up by his chin. Their eye contact, sincerity in Guts' voice, and him finally acknowledging his feelings. It's all he needs before he's pulling Guts in for more. 

"Guts, I love you." Clothes are being shed as they push and pull at each other, going back on forth for dominance. Guts wins in the end, as he always does. Not that Griffith's complaining. He willingly submits his body to him. Lips are bitten, so are necks and hickeys are being sucked into each other's skin, "I don't want someone else, I want you." Their kiss damn near busts his lip with the force in which he pulls him down for another.

He's shoved onto his back, and this time, and Guts takes the time to prep him with oil. His legs eagerly spread for Guts to take his place between them and fill him full. It doesn't take long until he's getting fucked at an overwhelmingly brutal pace, toes curled and eyes rolling back in pleasure. He's breathing so hard, damn near panting like a wild ass animal when Guts enters him and sets the steady pace. It’s been so long and it feels so right. He willingly welcomes the stretch and burn no matter how painful it feels.

After wrestling Guts on his back, Griffith fucks himself on that huge cock. His thighs quake from the excursion and so does his arms, but he doesn’t falter. Guts places his hands on his hips and he fucks him from below. Those hard upwards thrusts had his back arching and him biting his lower lip every time. His body shuddered, trembled, and sang from his touch. They wrestle once more for dominance until he's pulled down and rolled onto his side. Large arms hold onto him while he slams home. Griffith's arms squeeze him around his neck, like he'd die if he let go, "Guts, never leave me again. Never ever again. I-I missed you so much, I cannot stand going on without you." His voice cracks, hiccups, stutters amongst the tears and breathy moans he released.

"Never, ever again." Guts repeated. They stare into each other's eyes and Guts' hips stutter in rhythm before he buries his face into Griffith's neck, "I love you, Griffith." Months of pent up, touch starved tension all being let loose on each other. He digs his nails into Guts' back when he manages to cum untouched. Guts' teeth latch onto his neck with his intense orgasm. At this point, Griffith was nothing but a mess, the only sounds he made were squeals and squeaks of pleasure. It hurt his throat to make those noises, but he couldn't hold them back and damn did it feel good to let them out. He should be embarrassed from the noises he made, but he was shocked that his vocal range could get that high in pitch. It all felt just as good to finally have his love back. Back in his arms, in his bed, and deep inside of his depths where he belongs.

He must've had him for five more rounds after that, giving harsh slaps to his ass and pulling on his hair. Several different positions he found himself in and surprising each other with how flexible he could be. Every muscle within him burned from the stress, but he never wanted this to end.

Griffith never thought this would happen, yet, here Guts was with his head between his legs licking on his balls and cock. They were slow, teasing tender licks, but it set his body ablaze. They’ve never even had the chance to discuss this, but damn he’d be lying if it didn’t make him shudder. Fingers enter his full depths, slipping inside easily as they fuck the cum right out of him. So sloppy and mildly gross with the noise his wet hole makes from those fingers. In the end, they were exhausted and covered in fluids. They had to slide to the other side of the bed because it was cooler and cleaner. This is such a mess, but that's why he has servants. They'll complain, they'll talk shit, and this will confirm all of the rumors that their beloved king is fucking one of his soldiers and another man at that but he couldn’t care less.

"I want to stay like this forever." Griffith sleepily mumbles, "I never want to let you go." He draws imaginary patterns upon Guts' chest with the tip of his finger. He knew Guts was asleep when he didn't reply, but that was fine. He'll be joining him soon anyways.

"Lord Griffith's beloved" Is what people have taken to calling Guts. Guts would often snap at them, "I have an actual name, use it!" Eventually, the name stuck and Guts accepts it with a frown. First the servants found out about their relationship, and now everybody knows. On their first tryst together, the mysterious stains and blood on his sheets started it all. Then the way Guts tenderly held Griffith's hand that night when he went batshit in his own room. Finally, when several of them walked in on the two sleeping within each other's embrace the morning after Guts' return had confirmed it all.

Griffith doesn't give a shit if anyone talks ill of them, he never cared and never will. Of course it's all just jealous women who are bitter that they'll never have a chance with him now that he’s loyal to Guts and Guts alone.

His thoughts get the better of him while he bathes, staring blankly at a lone rose petal among many which floated on the surface of the milky water consisting of salts. He's suddenly startled when someone knocks, "Come in." Griffith calls out. It's Casca.

"Hey," She greets, "How are things?" She notices the dark purple marks on his neck and chest, "Ha, nevermind that question, I take it things are great."

Griffith smiles as he rubs the pleasant smells of flower petals into his skin, "Is everyone else sated now that Guts is back?"

"Of course!" Casca answers, "They all immediately wanted to go and drink and party. I told them 'who the hell gets drunk this early?' And they replied 'We do!' So they're off to tear up a tavern. I feel bad for whoever has to clean up their mess."

The two share a moment's worth of laughter, "That's good. I'm glad to see everybody's happy and things are going back to the way they were." He answers, pondering whether or not he should ask her the next thing that's on his mind. Fuck it, "Listen, I know you harbored feelings for Guts at some point, you might even still do in fact." He paused, seeing her reaction and how she raised her brow and snorts, "You can try to deny it, but something was there between you two. Now, I'm not here to threaten you or anything, I only humbly ask if you have any ill-will towards me?"

"I-" She began, "I don't. I know it seems like I should hate you for practically taking him away, but you didn't do anything to upset me." Casca went on, "Guts and I were never together in the first place so I had no claim over him."

Griffith perks up, "Really? I for sure thought you'd hate me, just like other women hate Guts for ruining their chances with me." He jokes, "I for sure thought you loved him and part of me felt guilty for willingly stepping in between that, which is why I hesitated and talked myself down from confessing to him for so long." He thinks about their moments. When he saw Casca kiss his cheek and exchange soft gazes with each other. Maybe he was overthinking it, they were just close friends joking around and nothing more. Everybody gets affectionate with their own best friend at some point, right?

Casca takes a second to laugh at that, "No, I don't. Don't worry, I don't even think I'd want to spend the rest of my life with him." She admitted, "He's so… Brooding and distant.”

"He is," Griffith agreed, "I like that."

"I know it seems like I loved him, but I didn't. I suppose it's also my fault for making it seem that way with how I lead him on." She went on, "I'm surprised you managed to tie him down and get him this smitten. He seems like the type of person, to me at least, to have as something on the side, not something serious or long-term."

"You know he told me he had feelings for you, for the both of us actually, but this was a long time ago, that night when I broke my hand on a wall.” Griffith smiles at the end of that sentence. It was such a childish thing for him to do and, for a while, he was humiliated. Now it all seems funny to him the more time passes.

“I know, I always knew." Casca shrugs, "Trust me, Griffith, if I truly wanted to be with Guts, I would've taken him the moment I had the chance, sure, I've flirted with and teased him, but we never even slept together and we often flirted with each other as a joke. Now he wanted to fuck, but I told him off." She explains, "He's all yours and I'm fine with that. You two are happy, and I knew you've had feelings for him long before we even got here." She gestures to the floor, more so, to the castle. It was true. Griffith was always sweet on Guts head over heels he was, years before he got where he is now. Back when they were just mercenaries, "Why would I hate you and try to take away the one thing that makes you smile? I've never seen you smile and look at someone the way you smile and look at Guts." She continues, "Your face just lights up when you see him and when you talk to him, it’s as if he made your day just by talking to you. I’m your friend and real friends don’t do that."

Her speech was touching, it caught him off guard and he was stunned with silence, "Casca," he smiled and held up his arms, "Come here." She chuckles as she came over to hug him, not minding his wet arms around her, "You're such a great friend, I've never told you this before and I never appreciate you enough for it. I-" he stutters, "Thank you."

"Aw, you big sap." Casca grins and she lets him go, "Now, don't let me distract you from getting ready, kings are busy and are expected to be ready by a certain time of day, right?" He nods as she points to the clock on the other side of his chambers.

He was tired at the end of the day, after having his ears talked off by nobles, other royalty, and militia generals from neighboring kingdoms. Multiple kingdoms have stepped forward to propose an alliance, multiple documents signed, multiple troops relocated, multiple discussions held that often went on for hours on the same subject. His ass hurt, and it wasn't caused by Guts this time no, it was caused by the chair. He couldn’t wait to get out of it and away from all of these people. He’s had his dinner, he’s attended their meetings, now all he demands is to be alone with his precious Guts.

His lower back screamed at him when he finally stood up. Griffith was practically running back to his chambers. Anything that required his attention now could wait until morning.

Much to his surprise, Guts wasn't in his bed. Instead, he was in the bath, "Is that you, Griffith? Care to join me?" Griffith heard him call out as he entered. The room was so steamy, so hot. When he pulled back the curtains that shielded the bathtub, it only released more steam into his face. This sudden splash of heat soothed him and it felt like he could breathe again as it opened his congested nostrils. Guts’ presence set him at ease.

Griffith sleepily smiles, “Guts.” he said his name as if he were relieved. He dips his hand into the bath water and yanked his hand away, "Damn! This water is boiling." Guts only cheekily smiles in response and held his hand out in offer. Griffith hesitantly strips and slowly dips his feet into the tub, "Fuck." He sighed as he grabbed Guts' hand who helped him step down the stairs under the water. It took him a moment, but he finally managed to sit on Guts’ lap in the overwhelming heat. His skin instantly deepened to a shade of red all over.

"Not so bad now, isn't it?" Large arms encircle his frame from behind.

"Hmph," Griffith spat, "Actually, now that you mention it, it does feel more bearable." His temperature began to adjust to the heat, but the longer he sat there, the more he began to feel drowsy. He laid his head back on Guts' shoulder. The heat, the touch of Guts' hands on his thighs massaging him and light kisses to his neck. It was pure bliss and he was already falling asleep. He trusts Guts will keep his head above the water should he sink.

"Long day?" Those same hands slowly rub against his thighs and abdomen, soothing as ever. Griffith only quietly nods in response. 

He can't recall what happened after their short lived banter, but he awakens in his bed bare but warm. Despite this warmth, he still felt cold, like something was missing. His heart sank while his hands frantically searched underneath the heavy blankets until Guts responded by grabbing his waist, "I'm right here." Griffith instantly moves towards his voice and heat. The bedroom was dark, save for a lone lantern on the nightstand next to the bed which illuminates the room in orange.

Griffith pressed his face into his lover's chest while his very own hands explored the other's muscled back. He smelled of roses and flower petals, it was such an alluring smell for him. He couldn't get enough of it and it was a far cry from the typical metallic musk which all probably rubbed off on him from that sword. He felt every ripple, bump, and curve against his fingers as they drifted downwards then stopped at his lower back.

He wanted to grope his ass, but found himself hesitating. His mind began to ponder. The two have never talked about Griffith being on top, it just never came to their minds in the heat of the moment. Not that he hates constantly being submissive, but he wouldn't mind being dominant for a night. He's never touched Guts there, and quite frankly, he doesn't think Guts would even like that. A kiss to his forehead pulls him out of thought, "You okay?" Guts smiles.

"Oh, y-yes I am." Griffith quickly snatches his hands away and pulls them towards himself, just under his chin. Guts' hands grab onto his, capturing his smaller fists within his own.

Griffith stared at their hands, such a contrast of texture, size, and color. Rough against smooth, large against small, dark against light. They are the embodiment of Beauty and the Beast, an angel of light and a demon of the dark, Griffith is the sun of the day and Guts is the moon of the night. His hands seemingly shielded his own from the outside and surrounded them in warmth. Casca was his sword and Guts was his shield. He loved it, he loved him so much. He looks into Guts' eyes. They must’ve been thinking the same thing because they leaned closer and their lips locked. Their kiss deepened. Griffith pressed his thigh between his legs and against his cock. Guts responds with both of his hands groping at Griffith's cheeks, spreading him wide as a finger teased at his entrance. It surprises him and he gasped against his lips, but he spreads his legs wider and arches his back.

He wants to do the same to Guts, but once again, his hands stop at his lower back. He isn't sure what's stopping him from drifting further, and for some reason, he doesn't want to ask. Griffith distracted himself from the task at hand with those thoughts and he pushes them out of his head. For now, all he wants is Guts’ cock down his throat.

Somehow, Griffith managed to force Guts to roll onto his back. He wasted no time in placing himself between Guts' legs and sucking on his heavy balls. His cock, it was so huge, so long when erect within his hands. No doubt about it, it was about the length of his own forearm. Guts laid back, a pleasured sigh and swear words upon his lips when Griffith engulfed the head in his mouth. This time, he was going to take his time sucking him off, not rushed like before.

He slowly takes him down to the base, holding himself there to swallow and tongue at the underside. This had Guts suppressing an involuntary thrust into that heat, even when Griffith pulled away for air, his hips still attempted to chase that pressure. He watches, amused as Guts fucks his fist in time with his strokes.

"Griffith, don't stop." Guts groaned, his hand already at the back of Griffith's head and pushing him down.

He slaps the other's hand away, "No, we're doing this my way at my own pace. You had your fun last time." Right, he sure did. He fucked Griffith's mouth and carelessly spent himself down his throat.

Guts remained silent while his balls were sucked, licked and gently pulled at, gasping loudly when Griffith took him into his mouth once more. He was close to cumming already, wanting to spill inside of his mouth until he chokes on it and his cheeks puff up from being full. Then pull away to blow the remainder of his load all over his face. Griffith looks damn fine with his release on his face, splattered across his nose and forehead. Mouth agape with his essence glistening on his tongue. 

"Griffith." Guts couldn't control himself when he picks up the pace. Taking him halfway while one hand strokes the remaining length and the other pulls on his balls, "I'm gonna-" he cuts off his own sentence to cry out a slew of curses, "Don't stop, don't stop." He chants, the string of curse words dying in his throat when he finishes. Guts held his breath, watching as Griffith effortlessly continued throughout his orgasm at the same steady pace as before. It hit him so hard, his ears rang and his legs trembled. He eventually slows when Guts caught his breath and shut his eyes. Griffith toys at the tip for a while longer before opening his mouth, letting the copious amount of cum slowly spill out and down Guts' cock. So messy. So lewd. So sexy. Griffith could make anything sexy, shit, he could probably make combing his hair sexy.

His tongue was completely coated in white when he began to sensually lick it all up. It was one of the most intense orgasms he ever had. He's never felt this lightheaded and sated from someone sucking him off alone. Damn, Griffith knew how to use that mouth of his in more ways than just one.

He sits up and joins Guts at his side, pressing his hardness against his hip and desperately rocking his hips, "Think you can finish untouched again?" Guts asked to which Griffith shakes his head, "Why not? You can do it, you’ve done it before." He rolls Griffith onto his back and teases him with just two fingers on the tip of his cock. It had him thrust into the contact but Guts pulled away. He only kisses and bites him on the neck while his fingers toy and pull on his nipples.

"Guts-" Griffith complained as his hips thrust against nothing but air. His cock was so red, so hard it hurt and Guts watched it twitch and his abs tighten up with each upwards thrust. He didn't last long at all and he bit his lower lip as he shamelessly spills all over his own stomach. Only then did Guts touch him, stroking him to completion, "Fuck," Griffith sighs, "Look at me, you got me all dirty again."

Guts scoffs and simply wipes him clean with the nearby towel he assumed was used to dry him off from the bath earlier, "There. Problem solved." He tosses it to the floor.

They lie in silence for a moment, basking in the euphoric afterglow. The thought came back to him. He should really bring it up, at least ask. Griffith sighs and goes for it, "Guts, will you ever let me on top someday? I'm perfectly fine with being submissive and you don't have to let me if you don't want to. I know you're a dominant in bed." Guts only frowns, a troubled expression upon his face, "What's wrong?"

"I-" Guts began but stops to sigh, "Listen, I don't think I'm ready for that." He's never let another man do that to him, ever. Not since…

Griffith notices his hands trembling, "Shit, I'm sorry." He's now well aware of what Guts was trying to say. It all came flooding back to him, the way he recalls how Guts physically recoils when another man touches him. It all makes sense now. For a moment, a bitter rage threatened to overtake him, somebody touched his Guts, traumatized him for life. They deserve death, they deserve to be torn apart by vultures and insects. Griffith calms himself down by slowly exhaling, "Shit, I-I won't ever ask you of that again. Never again. I'm sorry." He hugs him and kisses his cheek. Guts hadn’t realized he was squeezing his own fingers painfully within his fist until Griffith’s hand rested upon them.

"It's okay, Griffith, really." Guts reassures, "I never told you that, I really should've. I should've told you what I was okay with doing and what I wasn't okay with doing a long time ago." Part of him feels guilty, part of him feels bad for Griffith. He wants to make the other happy, but not in a way he wanted. Guts began to ponder if Griffith really was tired of being bottom all the time.

Griffith nods, "I see, this is why I'm glad that I was always hesitant to touch you back there. I never knew if you would've liked it or not. I didn't want to upset you and bring back painful memories. Again, I apologize for asking."

"I appreciate that very much, actually." Usually, most partners of his wouldn't ask, they'd just do it. It wasn't upsetting to him at all because at least they were women who just playfully slapped his rear or grope at him. Casca has jokingly done it multiple times, she’d either slap his ass or kick it. Guts gives it a thought, "Hm, though I think an innocent touch is okay. Just no penetration."

"That's fine with me." Griffith smiles at him and he smiles back, “I thank you for picking me to tell, must’ve taken a lot of strength and it shows you hold a deep trust for me.” At least it was out of the way and it feels like a weight was lifted off of his chest. Guts never told anyone else what was done to him and even if he didn't outright say precisely what happened, it felt good to get it out of his system and tell someone. Maybe there will be a time when he fully heals and becomes willing to openly talk about it in depth and try something new with Griffith. For now, Griffith was sated right where they were and he couldn't be any happier.


End file.
